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    dots Submission Name: disengagedots

    Author: rws
    ASL Info:    58/m/ohio
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 2779/1297/258
    Words: 287
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 534
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2229

       ~too many captains spoil the alien brew~

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.



    Jean Luc’s musings as he flees
    Murderous Romulans and wrestles
    With a heroin addiction

    Ah me…

    Star date, star date
    May the sweet and nebulicious
    Grace my plate…

    Chaos theory…

    Where was I?

    My crew has been
    Slaughtered in a multi
    Ethnic cleansing as
    I dawdle like a salted snail
    Deliberating the meaning
    Of a word

    “We must discuss
    the issues and
    be damned,
    ye piss ants!”

    Is it…
    Warm in here?

    Pardon me
    This sweet candy
    Has engaged
    My naked pate-
    The worms in
    My skull
    Say ‘yeah!’

    Death…I say
    May the impotent
    Burn in a hell
    Hotter than
    Thirty-five years
    Of deferred
    Vulcan sex…

    Death to damnable
    Romulans, communists
    And telemarketers
    Self-help gurus screwed
    In seven languages

    Cruel bastards all!

    Pursue, destroy
    Defeat, reward, atone
    Arouse, take a number
    Ponder life
    Aboard the porcelain

    Cursed Kirk fetes
    The babes – I’m left
    With no more than
    Telepaths who’ve
    Shrewdly refused
    My moves before
    I’ve moved the muse
    Or bade them

    Doctor Crusher…yeeesss
    My symbiant, let an
    Old man’s hands enlighten
    Thee, my poppet…flight? How?
    My feet are firm on this
    Bubble of earth far
    From home

    I don’t want to think
    I’m ready
    To jettison diplomacy
    And enter heaven
    On the arm
    Of a green-skinned


    The tattered battlements
    Are no more than illusions

    Wake me when
    The war is over

    Make it sew…

    Submitted on 2008-02-05 18:07:50     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      you're a crazy headf.uck billiam. you really are.
    | Posted on 2008-02-07 00:00:00 | by silent strings | [ Reply to This ]
      Why the double space? It sort of takes away from the poem. Maybe you can make it single spaced and then repost it? That would be fantastic if you did, because I couldn't really go through it like this. I felt that the introduction kind of let the reader take the perspective of the heroine addict, but I can't be too sure...because I didn't finish. I would love to, though, it seemed intriguing.
    | Posted on 2008-02-05 00:00:00 | by Renč Magrete | [ Reply to This ]
    i had moments of clarity throughout this piece but most of the time i was lost lost lost.

    lost isnt a bad thing though.

    this whole piece is emotionally disengaged and yet it isnt completely so because it is clear to the reader that the writer does actually have something they are trying to convey and so on some levels there is connection to be found.

    i read this and heres where i think:

    the italics at the start... jean luc... it reads like an impersonal newspaper headline.
    as if the heroin addiction part has been thrown in to make the reader need to read it because heroin addictions are wrong and we need to pass moral judgement etc etc etc

    the rest of the piece does hop all over the place even though there does seem to be a direction in which it is hopping. and it all seems completely unconnected and yet it isnt and i guess thats the nature of a mind that has consumed too many subtances and is left worse for the wear as a result...

    i am quite convinced you are a genius.
    i am even more convinced this comment does nothing. my apologies.
    | Posted on 2008-02-05 00:00:00 | by Someones Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]

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