The Bitter Sweet Demise -------------------------------------------
Towering emerald and russet giants taint the light
Pale yellow grass tickles beneath silken bare feet
Thorns perforate sincerely at things deeply locked away
Screams of a haunting history whisper through dying leafery
Deadly poison exudes from the sky and falls like barbed rain
Drenching the body in it's promise of a ponderous death
Arms spread wide open to gratify it's bitter embrace
Bleeding optics close against the winged tribulations circling above
Dark euphoria envelopes like a long lost lover
A smile is pulled wide by the pure abomination of the overdose
Realization sets in with the push of rustic hypodermic needles
A consuming fire writes prescribed words in the surrounding stones
A death date is writ in the aphotic glass paved path
Hope awaits on threateningly tapered edges
The heart slows with the chilling feel of the wind and ghosts
Pervading vultures asphyxiate promptly willing flesh
Pink wine spills on cold-carved lips that refuse movement
Sauntering fantasized spirits watch the other-worlds ascending
Drunken imps dance wickedly around the life aborted corpse
The door opens with the horrific tales of secreted endings...
This poem is remarkably hard to comment on the type of level I like to comment on... simply because each individual line seems to have no link to any of the other lines in each stanza. Your imagery and choice of words was absolutely wonderful, you obviously have a strong grasp of poetic techniques, and it makes it savory to read... But I had to analyze is so closely to get ANYTHING out of it, and even then I probably missed the desired meaning. At first with the emerald giants, and yellow grass, I was thinking a forest for the setting.... but as I read on it seems like that wasn't the image I should've conjured up. I have no idea really, but the whole poem has a solemn look and feel, almost a conclusive acceptance of impending death. Feel free to straighten me out, and give me a little insight through which I can reread this poem and take a little more from it from your eyes, otherwise it'll drive me crazy.
This isn't the normal poem about someone's demise (also not a word you hear that often). And I agree with medusa, this is a poem that you would want to read over again just because of what's being said in the poem.
Even though I'd hate to say something negative, there is one spelling error,
finally... i weed through dozens of poems ever so often giving in to the need to say what i really think of them and then i hit something like this.
something that you have to read more than once not because you didn;t understand what was being said but because it was worth reading a second time so that maybe later on in the day your mind will wander back to that specific phrase.
Submission Name: The Bitter Sweet Demise
