Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: the panda moondots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: blackbird
    ASL Info:    31/male/reykjavik iceland
    Elite Ratio:    2.35 - 194/328/300
    Words: 145
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 573
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1046



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsthe panda moondots
    -------------------------------------------


    & where does the time go,
    having spun from these lofty heights
    without you?
    the root of the world
    gnawing strange teeth
    into my insides.

    i found you screaming
    in the distance
    torn & covered in blood
    like some sacrificial
    goat of youth,
    clutching at the peices of your heart
    that wouldn't go back in.

    & i noticed
    that you sacrificed yourself
    for the sake of suffering.
    misery repeats
    in your eyes
    like a record.

    & what does that make me?
    in some self compromise
    i've found romance
    in the wilting of love.
    i'm just the same record
    playing backwards.

    i often bleed into my own dreams.
    & lately they seem scattered with you.
    maybe that's why sleep
    escapes me.
    i need to see white trees,
    the panda moon upon you.
    then the end of the world
    will come to me.




    Submitted on 2008-02-10 15:11:41     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      "...clutching at the pieces of your heart
    that wouldn't go back in.

    & i noticed
    that you sacrificed yourself
    for the sake of suffering.
    misery repeats
    in your eyes
    like a record."

    her body is an hourglass and it's ticking away. once again you've outdone yourself merlo. finding the beauty in simplicity and drawing it out untill that's all we can see.


    | Posted on 2008-02-10 00:00:00 | by in shadow | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    157337

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Push written by JanePlane
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Linger written by saartha
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    The Promise written by annie0888
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    Wavelength written by saartha
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Bond written by saartha
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    untitled written by Chelebel
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry