Did you ken what confusions you'd cause?
A few simple lines to commemorate a royal wedding
On the feast day of a Genoan saint.
You and your raunchy humor
And bawdy thoughts
Of birds mating.
What a way to speak of the Royals!
The joining of countries
Reduced to a tumble!
And now, Geoff!
People are mistaking your "customs;"
Crediting them to similar Romans,
Pagan in thoughts and deeds;
Naked in the streets
Delivering pregnancy rites.
Those Corinthians would be mortified by our cupids:
Babies in Diapers, Indeed!
What a colossal mistake--
Equating the day with the gods.
How could You!
Those poor Worthy* martyrs
Consecrated by the Church.
Their feast day now celebrated
With sweets, chocolate, and edible underwear.
Your tales have carried
Until commercialism reigns,
And Saints' day resembles a pagan marriage
Dressed in blood-red and pink.
Oh Geoffrey! If you'd only known!
You'd be laughing.