Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Brieflydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: vedanta19
    Elite Ratio:    3.28 - 503/510/143
    Words: 171
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 978
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 1248



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBrieflydots
    -------------------------------------------


    Love visits, stays for a twilight,
    leaves early, almost like a falling star,
    disappearing,
    exhausting,
    unbearable;

    Like a untold story, a saga,
    of tears, pain and happiness ending
    in a mere moment,
    love never stays,
    self need to be clever,
    naiveness - tale unexisted,
    he said,
    soul less, matter-of-factly
    a lost orchid on spring day;
    when he arrived,
    hugs and kisses - a favourite song,
    of lovefilled day,
    when smile had a reason,
    alas! tears remained,
    almost like a buffoon to a wise soul,
    laughable, hysterically funny;

    random thoughts put together,
    randomness of souls
    ending in unconnected verses,
    like tears lost and found
    in zigzags of life - unsettled,
    so confused,
    when you left,
    took my soul with you -
    so briefly!
    i am soul-less now,
    so painfully scattered -
    in those short moments of breath -
    living briefly - clueless,
    loving scaringly - if that's the word!
    my life now.
    wondering - can love do that to anyone?!
    or is it just me?!






    Submitted on 2008-02-17 17:12:03     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I think no experience in life can bring more joy, more exhiliration, more comfort that love; and, when gone awry, nothing can bring more heartache, misery, and pain!

    This is a wonderful bit of prose on the most difficult and complex subject that us poets write about, and that is ..... Love!

    This is beautifully complex, tender, and sensual; it is myraid, involved, and confusing, like love itself can be!
    | Posted on 2008-02-18 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ]
      This is... I don't know. So emotional, powerfull, touching... I loved it, and it's definitely going on my fav list.

    "Love visits, stays for a twilight,
    leaves early, almost like a falling star,"

    Beautiful. Simply beautiful.

    Best of luck. :)

    Eliza
    | Posted on 2008-02-18 00:00:00 | by Piper | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    157707

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    The Abyss of Love written by poetotoe
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry