Talk to Me (for Jonathan)
Written by amrslamr
I wanna talk about everything:
How I feel, what I did, what I said.
You wanna talk long enough
To kill time till we get back in bed.
Then, even in loving, youíre silent.
Youíre there but youíre all closed up tight.
I feel like Iím looking for unlocked doors
But you donít want to let me inside.
You lock up your lips and your eyes stay closed.
Does it matter that Iím in the room?
I might as well be any body
Well, I guess I just might be, to you.
I wanna tell you I love you,
How I thought about you all day long.
I want to be sweet and to kiss you,
And play you my new favorite song,
Instead I see you pick your boots up
And I know that when you get them on
Youíll walk out the door and forget me
Until next time you come to my home.
I try to pretend that you care more,
That surely Iím not just release.
But then you donít write me for three days
And your silence speaks volumes to me.
I get angry and hurt and you act surprised.
Why am I giving you a hard time?
How demanding of me to expect you to take
Thirty seconds to drop me a line!
Why, youíre just too darned busy thatís all.
Oh, hey, did you see last weekís game?
And your phone didnít work so you just couldnít call.
How on earth, then, could you be to blame?
I canít understand what youíre thinking
When you pick up your phone and you see
That Iím thinking about you and wrote you,
But you donít feel like answering me.
Do you think, ĎOh, I know that sheís waiting,
But I really donít care how she feels.í?
Are you subconsciously sabotaging
Something good Ďcause you donít think itís real?
Are you trying to knowingly hurt me
With your passive aggression attack?
The pain you inflict with your absence
Is a message you cannot take back.
You hit me much harder with silence
Than you could if you just knocked me down.
You say youíre too busy to text me,
But we both know youíre putting me down;
That Iím not worth your time or your effort
To be kind or considerate to.
And, anyway, why should you bother?
Your silence is working for you.
You get what you want and I let you.
I give it to you willingly.
Someday Iíll get stronger and tell you
You canít come if you donít talk to me.