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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Souvenir from Aldevincodots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Suven7
    ASL Info:    18 female Fla
    Elite Ratio:    7.1 - 477/259/47
    Words: 97
    Class/Type: Prose/Nostalgia
    Total Views: 81
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 614



    Description:
       My sentimental musings on a bracelet I brought back with me from the Philippines.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSouvenir from Aldevincodots
    -------------------------------------------


    The ends of her bracelet dangle
    From her wrist – a delicate
    Brown wrought in native fiber.

    One end has come undone,
    Splaying many clumps
    And looking even more
    Rugged than usual.

    It would fit her well
    To wear it only when her
    Sleeves are short enough
    For it to show, but winter
    Is neverending, summer
    Slow in surmounting its place.

    It’s good enough that the
    Big smiling sun – etched on
    Synthetic wood – on the
    Bracelet peeks out at the
    World once in a while.




    Submitted on 2008-02-19 18:51:07     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      The first several stanzas are very descriptive and definitely bring that 'perspective' element to the table. My favorite stanza was the last though...
    It’s good enough that the
    Big smiling sun – etched on
    Synthetic wood – on the
    Bracelet peeks out at the
    World once in a while.
    This is where you brought both your observations and your odd insight together and easily established a deeper meaning...that didn't seem forced either.

    I really like this poem...it's syntactical structure and use of imagery make this one of my favorites in your recent "quick" series :D

    <(,)>
    Love - Olah
    | Posted on 2008-02-21 00:00:00 | by Olah89 | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
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