[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Setting of a Misplaced Selfdots

    Author: Mandolin
    ASL Info:    10/15/89
    Elite Ratio:    5.4 - 131/145/85
    Words: 276
    Class/Type: Prose/Longing
    Total Views: 1100
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1655

       Forgive typos, this was copied from something handwritten into Notepad.

    I wrote this to set in ink some ideas, it's not really a work - just more of what I made a note of - as a setting for a novel I'm writing for myself, about myself.

    It's a bit of a magical fiction.

    The place speaks of where my thoughts come from, their native land - the scenery of my mind.

    I'm often lost there.
    I often find myself there.
    It's honest.

    As much feedback as possible desired.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSetting of a Misplaced Selfdots

    This is where it begins, a densely populated forest. Trees like thick and weather worn fingers reaching up to dip into the shadowed and syrupy darkness created by a natural canopy; sap running down the scaly and shedding bark like a bittersweet ambrosia. First upon entering, the silence expands and swallows; an overpowering vacuum of a weird and paralyzing stillness, as if a hundred invisible eyes watched over the woodland with a predatory alertness, a self-hunting ground disguised with a tense and disturbingly false peace.
    Underfoot, a versatile aroma of moist earth rises; reborn from the cycling decay of many dilapidated years, encircling new life, loss, fertility, death. It is pungent. It is intoxicating. Upon the surface floor, an overwhelming and romantic hopelessness weakly shrouds and clings, attempting to disguise the deeper and far richer hunger, the ancient and instinctual drive for life. This is a ground that exhales a heady sense of trance and of dreams, like the breath of fermentation.
    The forest is a stronghold of a great and versatile power, as it is also the high-walled fortress of an entire history and culture of weakness; a maze of conviction, of hope, of dreams, and of contradiction. Strangest of all, this woodland crypt is laced with an intricate web of packed earth, a labyrinth of well trod paths so coarsely made, so naturally intricate for it is the master craft of a wild creature, that not even the greatest mapper could trace one path from its head to its foot, for they trip and skip, winding like a meaning lost within a stutter...
    This place is a probable ending as it is a beginning.

    Submitted on 2008-02-27 18:45:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      i think it,s a great introduction for the start of a story.the descriptions and images are really good, comparing the mind to a forrest i think it works well.the mind a stronghold of power, and all our hopes dreams insecurities are walled up behind it.
    sometimes it,s dark in the mind and then maybe the sun shines through the trees,letting in a little light and hope ,and lets us see things in a different perspective.
    i enjoyed the read, interesting and very creative.
    thanks for sharing
    | Posted on 2008-02-29 00:00:00 | by eyeless in gaza | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]