Description: wondering what it would be like to a dad?
did you ever wonder ? -------------------------------------------
did you ever wonder what it would be like to be a dad
to make and to have child ?
what would you name it ?
would you want a boy or girl ?
I wonder why sometimes what it would be like
to be a dad and how would I raise him or her
what would I do and what wouldn't I do ?
and would the look like me or her ?
what would they look like ?
I don't know .............
Its okay... It has some flow issues...and it doesn't really 'sound' like poetry. You know what I mean? I think you need to work on just writing whatever pops into your head. Just free write and see what happens. After you free write go through and change whatever sounds 'off' to you. And remember, people have different tastes so what I don't like you might, and what I like you mightn't. Either way, this piece was a good attempt, but to be brutally honest, it could use some work.
Now I am most definently not saying you should give up, practice makes perfect and this really is okay, but if you want to stand out... it could use a little oomph.
Submission Name: did you ever wonder ?
