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    dots Submission Name: eclipsedots

    Author: in shadow
    ASL Info:    22/F/ nightmares
    Elite Ratio:    3.58 - 581/277/103
    Words: 120
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1006
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 774


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    There is a moment in time
    When everything light
    Suddenly goes dark
    Something gets in between us
    And the sun


    Everyone sees it
    Everyone notices
    Everyone pauses to make sure it passes

    There is a moment it time
    When everything light
    Goes dark
    Something crosses paths
    And the dark irises overlap


    One person sees it
    Two people notice it
    They both hold their breath
    To see if it will stay

    When the ocean meets the sand
    When hidden pool meets the bank

    A moment in time becomes an event

    And no one is left the same

    Submitted on 2008-03-11 15:58:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      A neat and nifty poem very well done throughout and the title is, of course, perfect! I liked it a great deal, indeed. bravo... bravo... bravo ...
    | Posted on 2008-03-21 00:00:00 | by Algol46 | [ Reply to This ]
      " A moment in time becomes and event" i will have to remember that, that is probably one of my favourite lines.

    Anyway a beautiful poem, im not sure if it has a darker meaning. I think this as there is a lot of dark imagery that may represent someones one moment of violance.

    This is the second piece of work i have read of yours and i have to say im very impressed.

    Some wonderful use of imagery.

    Good read,
    | Posted on 2008-03-12 00:00:00 | by Mr R | [ Reply to This ]
      o i enjoyed this a lot.
    eclipses are so sweet... and especially as you mention, just a moment in time becoming an event...
    oh chilling to think about

    but this can be true of any split second tragedy

    for example a car accident, something that REALLY affects the lives of people involved (or involved with the people involved)

    i just really like that you can use the eclipse as a blanket metaphor for all sorts of things like that
    | Posted on 2008-03-12 00:00:00 | by andnow | [ Reply to This ]
      "A moment in time becomes an event ", I like that. Something trivial has weight- importance, if more than one person notices it... Where to go from that moment is the question? "Something gets in between us" so what is done during this eclipse?

    "He shines in the second rank, who is eclipsed in the first." -Voltaire

    You are on quite a roll today, no?

    | Posted on 2008-03-11 00:00:00 | by Ceyx | [ Reply to This ]

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