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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Don't Let Me Stop Youdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lebeauvide
    Elite Ratio:    2.91 - 75/179/84
    Words: 222
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 186
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1457



    Description:
       My boyfriend has come into the habit of leaving me to go be with his friends. When he's with them, he's a totally different person. He's someone that I don't like. He becomes someone ugly. He does things that he shouldn't... I want him to stop, but don't know how to say it.


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    dotsDon't Let Me Stop Youdots
    -------------------------------------------


    My mouth bleeds,
    Crimson dripping from where my teeth cut in-
    Trying to stifle the words of hate
    Desperately trying to escape between them

    My heart aches,
    As you twist the knife a little more
    Leaving me broken and wondering
    "What did you do that for?"

    My mind is ripping,
    Gaping open trying to grasp this thought
    It seems that you want someone
    Who is everything I'm not

    If you want freedom, take it.
    Who am I to stop you?
    I never wanted to hurt you
    But I never once forgot you.

    If you want to drink, then do it.
    I wonder what else you do
    I wonder who else you're with
    When I'm not there with you

    If you want to fuck, then do it...
    It seems that I'm not good enough
    I thought I was all you wanted
    But I guess I don't have the right stuff

    If you want to die, then do it.
    You're bringing on yourself.
    You're pushing me away,
    Leaving me for everyone else.

    I hate all your friends.
    They twist you into someone ugly
    Someone you didn't used to be
    Someone who doesn't love me

    The words come past your lips
    But do they ever touch your heart?
    I can't deal with this...
    You're tearing me apart.




    Submitted on 2008-03-20 21:05:01     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I like this piece, it is well structured and has a pretty clear image, the picture also works pretty well with the piece. So overall the writing is okay.

    But now I am gonna give you some advice, if he doesn't understand that he changes then he can't change it and you are stuck in that situation forever. Tell him that it hurts you and it isn't right, tell him he still has the freedom to do it but you feel like you are losing him and then it is up to him from then on in. Is it just the friends thing or the drinking and stuff as well? Because if it is all of that then it really isn't fair to you and you deserve someone who cares more about your feelings then that. But the only way to do that is to...communicate as corny as it sounds. But you shouldn't let it get to you like that, everyone acts diffrent around diffrent people but it is up to them to know what is best and it is up to you what you see in them. If you don't love the bad in someone you can't love them at all.
    | Posted on 2008-03-22 00:00:00 | by blankscreen | [ Reply to This ]


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