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    dots Submission Name: Instead of Spending...dots

    Author: Strator
    ASL Info:    22/M/US
    Elite Ratio:    4.09 - 160/142/67
    Words: 203
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 809
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 1323


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsInstead of Spending...dots

    ...Your last days ahead with a hard look, a piercing stair, think of me.
    View your days with happy smiles, grins a nods.
    For your everlasting breath is near...

    What else is worth holding onto, then your happiness?

    Breaking it up, saving your eyes for something other than myself.
    As in silent motion, white faced petals face a breeze stronger than hate, love or misery.
    Polishing our living memory of what is lost and burned.
    Etched into our retinas as an everlasting kiss.

    Nestled near, ready to rise and outshine the sorrow
    etched upon our face; hating that rusty nail, as it's driven into the metal.
    Lowering into the ground.

    As in a silent motion picture I feel the wetness seeping down the blackness that is my heart.
    Feeling the flames of what used to be and the ice that is now.
    Never forgetting all the while....

    As I say in this dreary sleep, this nightmare.
    Think of me without your hatred, remorse and sorrow.
    Remember the days of happiness, grins and nods.
    Remember me, instead of spending your days....
    With every breath,

    There is nothing else worth holding onto,
    Then your happiness.

    Submitted on 2008-03-21 09:54:29     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Very lovely! I think you have a gift for writing, honestly I do.
    The only thing I would change is then to than.
    Then is time, than is like rather than.

    | Posted on 2008-05-14 00:00:00 | by Madelaine | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow! This is really impactful and I was drawn to the title right off. This has a lot of layers and it melds darkness and light. It offers up questions but do the answers really matter?
    Very well done!
    love,peace,joy,abundance & smiles to share
    | Posted on 2008-03-21 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]

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