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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Breakdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: GoKart Mozart
    Elite Ratio:    5.47 - 131/93/49
    Words: 251
    Class/Type: Poetry/Broken
    Total Views: 256
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1794



    Description:
       longest poem i've ever written?

    perhaps.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBreakdots
    -------------------------------------------


    You ask of me,
    "Love, can you see
    In the future,
    You and me?"

    I'll think for a moment
    And answer Thee:


    "In the future
    I can see
    -Together always-
    You and Me.
    But there's a catch,
    My Love of Today,
    These feelings between us
    Will go away."


    "What mean you,
    My Dearest Girl?
    You have my heart.
    You're my whole world-"


    "I know, I know.
    I know it's true
    Because, to me,
    The same are you.

    But time will change
    I feel in my heart
    That someday, Love,
    We two shall part.
    While that future
    Looks so real,
    The warmth I should
    I cannot feel."


    Thy sullen countenance upon me looks.
    My words have brought to life your fears.

    For a minute, you were vulnerable,
    Your guard carefully let down.
    You feel that i'm a traior
    And you're letting your trust drown.

    Your wall goes up,
    I hear it now.
    That nonchalance
    Settles across your brow.

    I know you care.
    I know you do.
    But you'll never admit
    I got to you.


    Do you give up now?
    Just stop trying?
    Tears in my eyes and
    You act like you're not dying?

    Was I just a lie to you?
    Is that all it takes
    To seal up your heart
    As soon as it breaks?

    Well i'll have you know
    That mine's broken, too.
    This is not at all the reaction
    I expected from you...




    Submitted on 2008-03-21 17:57:15     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Yeah, I reckon you are right...some reactions just aren't warranted. Like a wiseman once said..."All hail the mistakes of the children...for they guide the conscience of mankind." Wait...I think I just made that up. Hmmmm....yeah, I'm right, I just made that up. But I did hear it from the wind, so give the wind the credit.

    Decent story telling in the form of a poem. That is always hard to do, you did a perdy darn good job of it. Its a fun style to write in isnt it? I do it once in a while too.

    Thanks for sharing
    | Posted on 2008-03-21 00:00:00 | by hyproglo | [ Reply to This ]



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