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That's What I Said

Author: LucyDiamond
ASL Info:    17/F/Sky
Elite Ratio:    3.9 - 365 /575 /251
Words: 108
Class/Type: Poetry /Misc
Total Views: 1146
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 699



That's What I Said

He said

I’d be involved in shenanigans
and sleeping around
if I were.

I said,


He said

he’d be able to tell
at a glance
if that were my problem.

I nodded

up and down.

Then he said,

“Have a nice day!”
and I wanted to turn around
and stab him through his heart
and say,

“Have a nice day!



so I did.

Submitted on 2008-04-07 02:56:46     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  Nasty! Interesting, and intriging and differently... I enjoyed it muchly... bravo... bravo ...
| Posted on 2008-04-15 00:00:00 | by Algol46 | [ Reply to This ]
  Ohhh. O geez. Now that I know that I read it over and see what you were trying to say. Wow. People really do see things differently. I thought that this part:

He said

I’d be

was the GUY saying that. That's why I thought it was college. Hehe. Anyway, it makes sense now. I should have paid attention to where you were putting actual "quotation marks."
| Posted on 2008-04-07 00:00:00 | by Suven7 | [ Reply to This ]
  I have no idea what you're talking about but the structure and unusual diction (That's right AP English teachers) lend themselves to the overall funny, smart effect you achieved seemingly effortlessly.

The huge spacing, I think, were unnecessary. Maybe an enter or two would have done it. As it were it kind of freaked me out while reading it; like an overly intense moment after moment type thing that I did not appreciate because I don't like even the least bit of excitement and suspense in life because.

So does the first part have anything to do with college? Cuz you know guys and sleeping around usually happen then...

I have no clue what the second stanza is about. What problem?

The rest was just...tastefully done. I love endings like these...Muahahahaha!

Now you must tell me a detailed explanation of the concept behind this poem.

| Posted on 2008-04-07 00:00:00 | by Suven7 | [ Reply to This ]

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