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    dots Submission Name: Brunettedots

    Author: Algol46
    ASL Info:    200/m/East of Eden
    Elite Ratio:    2.72 - 1111/1235/613
    Words: 244
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 533
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1606


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    I dream you and I unforget,
    My tart and lovely cool brunette,
    Once more with love you wield that pain,
    Dead lover now twice over slain!

    Lean lust in an evening dress,
    My hungry green-eyed sorceress,
    Your flesh like polished ivory,
    My lethal sly calamity!

    Now in my dreams as once in life
    Provayer of the cruelest strife,
    I thought that gold would make you mine
    My laughing heartless concubine.

    I drowned in your long, scented hair,
    Ah, shameless girl, you did not care!
    With silver crowns I crowned your head,
    You drugged me! I was left for dead!

    I searched for you for countless years,
    At first through one long sea of tears,
    Across vast deserts, distant lands,
    Exotic shores and lonely strands.

    Then in one teeming slum that meets
    Dark alleyways and grimy streets,
    In some cheap brothel you were there,
    With still your lovely scented hair.

    Your eyes held not the least surprise,
    My face you did not recognize,
    With rasping voice I spoke my name,
    You shrugged and said: “It’s all the same.”

    “You may, indeed, spend time with me,
    Just pay, up front, this modest fee!”
    In tears I fled down that long stair,
    Drunk with the scent of her dark hair.

    I dream you and I unforget,
    My tart and lovely cool brunette,
    Once more with love you wield that pain,
    Dead lover now twice over slain!

    Submitted on 2008-04-07 11:19:10     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      this poem is so beautiful and sad. to find the one you love doesn't remember you, thats the greatest pain of all. I love your work.
    | Posted on 2008-04-09 00:00:00 | by TheBlackFairy | [ Reply to This ]
      Damn what a beautiful poem. Reminds me a lot of how I think Paulie must have felt in the movie Lost and Delirious. Made it even more heartbreaking. I love the imagery, of the crowns and the scented hair, the contrast with the slums, and the prostitution. Beautiful work. I loved it. (though it made me l------l <-- that ashamed to be a green-eyed brunette.)
    | Posted on 2008-04-08 00:00:00 | by brokenmuse | [ Reply to This ]
      I'm always more for simple words than overwrought vocabularies when discussing love but good god man the story comes through without a hitch. I"m sorry if this happened to you exactly as told, I hope it didnt, but I'm glad you wrote about it either way.
    | Posted on 2008-04-08 00:00:00 | by MC white | [ Reply to This ]
      Absolutely marvelous! Aaaah, but what a way to die; to be slain by a lovely Brunette!!!

    I think this poem is terriffic! I can't seem to find adequate words to compliment it, but the story, rhyme scheme, and structure were amazing! I think this is one of your best!
    | Posted on 2008-04-07 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ]

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