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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Communion c. by ruejacobs 4/13/08 2:15 a.m.dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: ruejacobs
    ASL Info:    37/feminazi/Gehenna
    Elite Ratio:    4.9 - 564/439/153
    Words: 119
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 288
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 739



    Description:
       goes with 'Helix' i guess


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsCommunion c. by ruejacobs 4/13/08 2:15 a.m.dots
    -------------------------------------------


    It’s hard to tell the parasite from the host
    Some days, depending on the view
    I bite my tongue, I tell you
    And you keep still
    Symbiosis makes dancers of us both
    In church, three years old, I bit down on the wafer
    Just two streets down from you
    Rice paper and cyanide:
    That’s what the flesh of gods is like
    I have tasted yours as well
    I felt its film against my teeth
    And pressed my fingers there, amazed
    It’s hard to tell the gods from the demons
    Some days depending on the view
    You bite your tongue, you tell me
    And I keep still
    Synthesis makes gymnasts of us both
    Bite down.
    Bite down.
    Bite down.




    Submitted on 2008-04-13 01:31:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I'm not sure I should have read this but, sigh, Can't take it back now.

    You taught me the games. That you clearly outlined in this poem. Remember Mum, Nana creates the Cynicism You expressed in comparing God (and Communon wafers) To Vampirism. Sigh, Did you know She dragged me to a healer? To "get rid of my demons". I Told her if he touched me I'd call rape. And then I critisised him through the whole service. Or Slept. But, I digress.

    ~Carrie
    | Posted on 2008-04-17 00:00:00 | by dismal_s child | [ Reply to This ]
      "Symbiosis makes dancers of us both" - That's pretty brilliant. The image was strong and yet, there was this graceful lining of "just-being-human" that seemed to have kept it, well, tender looking despite the image of biting that seems to be stuck in my head. But then again, this could just be a case of me being the wrong reader for the poem.

    But anyway...

    The first line and the title reminds me of Neil Gaiman's American Gods and the concept that Gods need us just as much as we need them because our beliefs keep them alive and their existance keeps us free from the fear of non-existance.

    And I do agree that synthesis makes gymnasts out of most of us. We need to be puzzle pieces in order to fit well with others. We need to offer things in exchange for the things that we get.

    I also liked how you approached this.

    To me, it felt like someone saying "it's nothing personal, it's just business." I felt a strong sense of cynicism in it but you did it without feeling robotic.

    That takes talent.
    | Posted on 2008-04-13 00:00:00 | by ANGELO | [ Reply to This ]


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