[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: the lavender of alwaysdots

    Author: blackbird
    ASL Info:    31/male/reykjavik iceland
    Elite Ratio:    2.35 - 194/328/300
    Words: 155
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 496
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1149


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsthe lavender of alwaysdots

    in the deadly hollow
    of the world
    i've found space between
    the remembered things.
    a place where you alone
    have come & gone
    in memories
    more terrible than air.

    could i ask a feather
    to breathe a storm more perfectly
    than the sadness
    of my heart's companion?
    or is each day
    merely another step
    towards distant mild oblivion?

    i recall
    slipping through the sheets
    like august fingers
    over warm wind.
    how, inside me,
    tiny holocausts
    were the prophecy
    that i became.

    & you,
    so mixed with the lavender of always,
    would fall into the night
    like the pink that you are
    with all those fiery hells
    inside you
    where you hide them.

    to have to feel pain
    to feel anything
    is working backwards.
    when will adoration open flowers
    into your secret brain?
    when will memory
    be more perfect than air?

    every broken beat
    is a war inside the chest...

    Submitted on 2008-04-14 15:22:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Your words are hypnotic, Merlo. And the way you rage so gracefully to maneuver through such weights is both admirable and inspiring. It also seems effortless because your writing makes me feel like you let the emotions just flow with this unstoppable need to, you know, be - have form and vulnerability in the convent of words. This, your method, is the perfect device for healing. And it is also Poetry at its raw and argueable most beautiful form.

    It surprises me that not a lot of people comment on your work. I just hope that they have, at least, read them.
    | Posted on 2008-04-14 00:00:00 | by ANGELO | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Incubus written by monad
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Bond written by saartha
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    The Promise written by annie0888
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    Summer written by layDsayD
    Wavelength written by saartha
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Break Up written by WriteSomething
    Giving written by jjd
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]