Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Blanketeddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Peggy Paris
    ASL Info:    61/F/USA
    Elite Ratio:    4.11 - 747/570/167
    Words: 114
    Class/Type: Poetry/Comedy
    Total Views: 827
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 722



    Description:
       Yes, I know I have a wacky sense of humor. I hope you get a smile out of this one.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBlanketeddots
    -------------------------------------------


    We thought we'd take a romp;
    We chose the best of dates---
    A picnic in the park
    With frisbees, kites, and skates.
    The day soon rolled around;
    The weather looked just great.
    I had a plan in place
    And met her at the gate.

    She brought baguettes and cheese;
    I lugged a lot of wine.
    We ran and played and laughed
    And bathed in bright sunshine.
    She looked so very chic;
    I felt so mighty fine.
    I asked her for a kiss;
    She set her lips on mine.

    The twilight found us there
    With love in finest bloom.
    We would have stayed all night,
    But ants said, “Get a room!”





    Submitted on 2008-04-23 17:12:52     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      yes, the ending made this for me....


    a very sensual piece disturbed by those annoying insects...:)

    jacob

    read several of your pieces...nice flow to your work....the rhyme seems easy and uncontrived.
    | Posted on 2011-04-01 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      Ok, truthfully, when I first started reading it, I didn't think it would be that funny. The ants are hilarious. This put a smile on my face.

    ~*~katara~*~
    | Posted on 2008-04-24 00:00:00 | by daughterofdeath | [ Reply to This ]
      LOL! Yes this is cute! :D It's got a lovely sing-song type of rhyme too~
    | Posted on 2008-04-24 00:00:00 | by arodase | [ Reply to This ]
      Ha! This is delightful, and the ending is surprising and adds further to the mischief and delight of the of the whole poem!

    Way to go lovely lady! This one gets top marks!!!
    | Posted on 2008-04-23 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    160615

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Your Lover written by Cordell
    Etiquette written by saartha
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    Every..... written by jackz
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (final) written by endlessgame23
    the living moment written by ShyOne
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    Cover written by saartha
    You read free written by poetotoe
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    Sleep Talk written by Queen_of_spades
    Love written by saartha
    untitled written by ShyOne
    no words for how graceful you are in this moment written by Daniel Barlow
    Records I written by Raphael
    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    a safe place written by Daniel Barlow
    prison written by ShyOne
    a mood to be free written by Daniel Barlow
    PEARL (Exclusive Poem) 10th Anniversary... written by Cordell
    the testing of hypotheses written by Daniel Barlow
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry