Not a Superhero by Ryuuzaki

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Submission Name: Not a Superhero dots

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Author:	Ryuuzaki
Elite Ratio:	4.5 - 2/5/3
Words:	252

Class/Type:	Poetry/Misc
Total Views:	64
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	1555

Description:
There is no rhyme scheme. There is no rhythm scheme. This is free-verse poetry in the purest sense, especially since it's not that good; I just wrote it as it came to me. There aren't even any literary devices, really, except for possibly one simile that I think I noticed while I was typing.

Anyway, I won't tell you what this is about. In AP Lit, we are to over-analyze poetry. So, over-analyze away. If you think it's about a person on a ghost ship playing Mario Kart, then so be it; as far as you're concerned, it's about a person on a ghost ship playing Mario Kart. I won't tell you that you're right or wrong either way.

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Not a Superhero dots

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The great mahogany doors open to allow passage through.
The light is bright enough to gleam off the tables
And to sear into the eyes of all who enter.
Eyes are alert and wild,
Tensions run high,
And my heart pounds hard in my chest.

Again and again and again I hear the lies—
The filthy lies, dripping with dishonor
And filling me with disgust.

Again and again and again I step forward,
Striking them down,
My voice loud and my aim true.

Again and again and again I hear and say the words,
Coming to me as naturally as breathing,
Leaving me as easily as cupped water.

And again and again and again I stand forth,
Fighting for all I hold dear.
Fighting for justice,
Fighting for truth,
Fighting for the world.

I stand here, on these polished floors, looking at this room
That’s as clean as a hospital room might be.
I stand here, finger outstretched, eyes sharp and my heart pounding—
I stand here in this room filled with people, but really alone, knowing
This is my battle to fight, this is my battle to win,
This is my battle to live.

And as I stand here, staring the trembling man before me down,
I know one thing for certain.

I am no superhero.
But when it comes to the world of justice—
When it comes to the realm of finding the truth and exposing the lies—
I am close enough.

Submitted on 2008-05-02 21:57:44 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
I'm probably way off but it sounds like you are a lawyer, but a lawyer with very strong moral belief in what is right and wrong and what you should fight for.

Or maybe you are an executive in a large company and you fight for the morally right way of doing things.

It sounds like it could even be about politics, like you are in parliment/congress or the equiv in whatever country you are in.

Either way it gives the impression that you are very good at what you are doing, the end paragraph i mean where you say "When it comes to the realm of finding the truth and exposing the lies—
I am close enough."

I know you said you wouldn't say but I'd be very interested to know what it is this is actually about.

As for criticisms for something you just threw out it sounds good, quite eloquent, except when you used eyes two lines in a row at the start, that just sounded a little off.

One of my favorite poems is free verse in a very similar style, although its much much much darker. Not that I generally like things that are dark... anyway I also have a "thing" about truth and lies and always trying to route out the truth and uncover lies but in much more mundane settings.
| Posted on 2008-05-02 00:00:00 | by DeadlyDodo | [ Reply to This ]
ur insane LOLLL

Okay, well, I'm pretty sure I know what this is about. Then again, I could be an idiot, but I'd much prefer thinking that I do, in fact, know what it's about, and as such, I am, in fact, not, in fact, an idiot, but, in fact, a person, who, in fact, uses too many commas, and, in fact, is unnecessarily repetitive.

On a less horrifying note...

I don't know exactly why, but this seems rather cold. The imagery suggests a dramatic, impressive, and almost regal environment and situation. (Regal as an adjective to substitute the one I want, of similar denotation). However, the emotion strikes me as authoritative, absolute, and thus cold in a commanding, dictatorial sense. Almost like a less alien 1984-esque situation, where perhaps instead of an entire nation, we're dealing with a specific situation. A specific room.

Interesting, because if this is what I assume it to be, cold and commanding isn't quite what you must have in mind.

Nonetheless, I do see the obvious connection between Mario Kart and what you've written. I think it'd benefit greatly if you made your subliminal advertisements much less suggestive. Perhaps a more subtle free-market capitalist whoring out of literature would do.

Anyway, see you at the convention next year.
--Gladius
| Posted on 2008-05-02 00:00:00 | by Aspermere | [ Reply to This ]

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