[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: ONCE UPON A DAYdots

    Author: hell_s knell
    Elite Ratio:    1.62 - 0/0/1
    Words: 620
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 416
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 3372

       A rather immature effort to create magic in our mundane lives...

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsONCE UPON A DAYdots


    ‘As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself transformed into a gigantic insect’-Kafka, Metamorphosis. And mine was no dream either. I was there, all awake, senses intact, feelings in order…. And yet, it seems a dream.
    Ever got the feeling that you are being watched even when you are asleep? It’s that exact intuition that made me sit up and look straight into the eyes of an exceptionally handsome man, sitting on the chair by my bedside. He was about thirty, a generous beard and beautiful auburn hair right up to his shoulder. His eyes were glowing with a divine light and his thin lips had an edulcore smile. I was a little embarrassed and gathered my bedclothes. I looked askew enough and before I could ask he raised his hand. And then I shuddered for the sunlight that came in from the window behind him, came straight through his hand. There was a hole right in the center of his palm. I stuttered and tried to get up but he leaned closer and said,” I believe an introduction would be futile. Now listen, child, I wish to remain incognito. You will not, repeat, not, disclose my identity.”

    I emerged out of bed in a half trance and clambered down the steps to the kitchen. I had my breakfast in silence. There he was sitting in my bedroom and I was chewing cornflakes. He could have gone anywhere! Why not the pope! Mother seemed amazed that I didn’t complain about the mandatory milk glass. I ran upstairs, got dressed and went in my bedroom. He was leafing through my books and looked smilingly as I entered.”Umm, sir”, I stammered, “just how am I supposed to take you to school?”. “Don’t worry”, he said. Only you will be able to see me. As he waved his hand, the school bag flew to me. I looked inside to find all the books packed to routine. I didn’t have the nerve to ask how. Stammering thanks I said, “Right, lets go then”.

    He sat by me all through during the bus to school. Occasionally, he would ask me about someone or something on the street. I had to whisper my answers though lest people should think I had gone mad. Already some were giving me dark looks for not allowing anyone to share my seat. But I was so immensely excited. Everyone talked of his return but to come to me! Same went on at school where he sat by me. I scored a remarkable 20 out of 20 in my math’s test. I knew all the answers to history and geography. He was a bit irritable during the moral science class though and I had to pacify him.

    After school, we went for a walk in the park for our bus had had a burst tire. (He said it would). We talked about the world; apartheid, nuclear power, war, hatred, communalism, consumerism, the degeneration of religion and even man’s reaching Mars. He was strangely reticent. I asked him a few questions and he answered them but there was so much pain in his eyes. I had reason to believe that I had caused it by discussing such depressing issues. And then, I could not hold it any longer and asked him,” Did you really come back from the dead?”. “I did”, he said. “And I shall come again, my dear friend, and judge all”. There was a puff of velvet smoke and he was no more. I stood there alone in the park. Now how many of us can claim to have Jesus as her friend!

    Submitted on 2008-05-12 13:54:24     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    The World written by jjd
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]