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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Knowing youdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: isis_lenore
    Elite Ratio:    3.63 - 335/126/47
    Words: 123
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 59
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 718



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsKnowing youdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Knowing me, I will be left hanging around,
    Clinging to the passion you exposed in me.
    I know, I should not wait to hear the sound
    Of your voice fading fast over a fickle sea.

    But I know, I want to hold on to this light-
    I fear, our time has passed, and it is to late
    To stop this creeping shadow, eternal night
    That you know already, is our fate.

    Knowing that you, left a crack open in the door-
    A small opening, for one last chance,
    For me to drown in your embrace, once more
    Knowing you, knew it only as a parting glance.

    (After me knowing you-) we are through-
    there is nothing left to renew.




    Submitted on 2008-05-23 21:54:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      "Overall assessment" of a love poem isn't so easy, because it's about a single incident. Reading a sonnet, we often expect the whole poem to be a metaphor for some big generalization; maybe the agony of ending a romance stands for all moving-on. But the other thing is - readers sympathise with you, on a personal level, and I think this is a poem like that. Perhaps it was for your ex-partner, and so we are given an intimate glance into your lives - which is not a metaphor, but a figure that I don't know the name of, even if some scholar has studied that one and given it a name!

    The minor metaphors in the lines - they could have been better. I mean that "worse" is getting figures of speech from well-known sayings; but better would have been some startlingly apt figures that I had never seen before. (That is a hard ask!)
    | Posted on 2008-11-11 00:00:00 | by Glen Bowman | [ Reply to This ]
      Hm... I like the piece. I can relate to it. I've been in such a relationship where we would fight and not speak to each other for a whole year some times and then we would be back together. But you're right, such things are better to finish. There's nothing more to learn from them...
    | Posted on 2008-06-17 00:00:00 | by Paradox | [ Reply to This ]


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