im crying, falling, dying -------------------------------------------
im crying but no-one can see
im falling but no-one can catch me
im dying but no-one can save me
i need a hero but all i find is villians
im lying here but still no-one comes
i want to be saved but im left to die
on the ground broken and faded
my heart shattered by the hate that surrounds me
i know i wont survive
i wont make it past this day
its the way it has to be
its the way it has to end
im crying, falling and dying
and still im alone
so i say goodbye
no-one can see and no-one cares
so goodbye to you goodbye to all of you
I think your talented, but also clichéd. It's dark yes, and I'm sure thats what your going for. But there are alot better ways to describe pain than with saying dying and hate and what not, its just way overused and mundane. But otherwise keep writing.
Submission Name: im crying, falling, dying
