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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Don't You Seedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: HaldirLives
    Elite Ratio:    5.12 - 234/149/60
    Words: 121
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1114
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 717



    Description:
       This poem was originally written as a contest submission on another site, but I had to pay to enter it. So here it is for you.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDon't You Seedots
    -------------------------------------------


    When you're walking down the street do you see
    The faces as they pass you by on that
    Road down which you travel with he and me?

    Do you see the secrets beneath the hat
    That shades the faces of a passerby?
    Dou you hear the notes from a prowling cat?

    Do you even notice what is so high
    Piercing that something that is above you?
    Men walk into a shop, do you know why?

    Do you smell what wafts out as it closes?
    Do you hear the hum beneath your two feet?
    Do you remember the faces of your

    Friends, sisters, brothers, mothers, fathers, kin?
    Do you truly know where it is you are?





    Submitted on 2004-07-02 15:06:33     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    4: Pretty cool
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    ||| Comments |||
      Nice, thought provoking piece. It is true, most exist but don't notice the existing. The form and flow was fair. Nice genuine piece.
    | Posted on 2005-07-03 00:00:00 | by Malcolm Bishop | [ Reply to This ]
      This is good. Don't really observe or notice things much, cause well I don't really care about anyone or anything, but I get it. Um, Kind of makes you think a lot, which is good, don't get me wrong, but you kind of have to think more than you would want to be able to partake in this! Know what I mean?
    | Posted on 2005-06-19 00:00:00 | by Lauren Guzman | [ Reply to This ]
      interesting. I semi-agree with Corvus's intpretation. I also see how this could be a great philosophical poem, especially in consideation of the last two lines. Check the punctuation to polish it up, but you did a really good job w/ this.
    | Posted on 2004-08-23 00:00:00 | by bentnotbroken | [ Reply to This ]


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