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My Daddy Capitalism


Author: Aaron Felix
ASL Info:    21
Elite Ratio:    4.35 - 162 /183 /93
Words: 125
Class/Type: Misc /Misc
Total Views: 837
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 605



Description:




My Daddy Capitalism



the static was
influential
in his work it was
blissful silence
in the politics

when
uncle random alternative
drank from the
too much cup

it took
a million
years to
get out!

tangential to this
is the
mansion
in which
all of what
of them
lived

ironically, very still
and yet
unmentionable
tax poetry:

courtesy
The bard IRS.




Submitted on 2008-06-05 04:22:24     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  i really liked this a lot, especially the 4th stanza. my only suggestion is that the last line kind of deflates the whole poetic tone of the piece. don't know what to tell you - you've got a real flow going up to that point and maybe you need to find another way to wrap up this piece. just me 2 cents - feel free to take it or leave it.

peace, love and all that other junk,

joe
| Posted on 2008-06-05 00:00:00 | by joeyalphabet | [ Reply to This ]


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