I wish I was a mystic.
So I could enjoy
the abundance of beauty
that the world showers me
with.
I want to understand
the moon and stars
their patterns in relation
to the passing of cars.
One day I'll live a life surreal.
Where I will awake
one morning and decide
to ride a comet across
the northern sky
Just to cop an intergalactic feel.
I'll be one with the dust
and the volcanic ash.
The gemini twin
with the twisted grin
Who understands its better
to feed his life to the sun
than to a bottle of gin.
How I wish
I could dissect myself.
To find out what makes
me tick.
And find that I too,
am as brittle and strong
as your grandfather's
walking stick.
We are all one with
the heavens and the earth.
I wish I could just appreciate
this life for more
than just what I think its worth.
how can someone wish to be a mystic and not be one already in some way, however futile it may seem to even think this? what you say here is you're already in that mindframe, appreciative of the fickle beauty of life and all it contains.
you have a far-reaching vision unlike many others. always hold onto that. and ignore the pompous naysayers who say otherwise.
I love this poem & it's meaning because I feel the same way. Just want to appreciate. Very good poem. Excellent meaning. Awesome lines. Great job! Keep writing.
I disagree, the passage marked as outstanding by the previous critic was... Less than inspiring. While I agree it was the one with the best flow, it's content was weak, a bit cheesy to say the least.
This poem takes on a cosmic theme, and the mention of something so common as a car takes away from that.
This entire peice is concocted from bits of rhymes and rythm that make no sense in conjunction with eachother. It is completely random and formless, which, if intended, was poorly conveyed, but a good choice nontheless.
I would say that overall, the idea behind this piece is stronger than the poem itself. The idea of having something else behind life that you are incapable of seeing without some sort of extraordinary ability is overused, but at the same time, admirable. It shows that you have a sense of wonder.
Some people just lack that.
I will submit to you that you don't need anything extra to see the beauty of everything.
You just need to open your mind, and accept that there is a subtlety to things that takes some degree of discipline to observe.
You have to be willing to admit that the most amazing aspects of life are not as obvious or as astounding as you anticipated.
They are the soft whispers of wind, and the minor movements of stars over the span of years.
They are the things you have to really listen and watch for.
Submission Name: Appreciation
