Not bad at all
This is a strong write that I also found to be very sad
I too have lived my life in the dark in the past and I know how painful it is to live like that
It wassnt until I let the light in (The Love of The Lord) that life became anew and everything started working out
If this write has anything to do with your own life I do Pray you find the happiness you are looking for
Please if you get a chance Please take a look at some of my writes and let me know what you think
i got that she was sort of the Angle of Death. you know. because she is represented by darkness and night and "takes their last breath"
your imagry was awsome. i could feel like she was standing next to me.
when writing try to keep a meter. it makes the flow of the poem, well, flow. it wraps the whole poem up and tranzitons from line to line making it meaning ful. i really liked how your couplets rhymed. awsome (its a common thing in my poetry and ilove it in others)
just remember dont force a word to rhyme. its better to have it not rhyme than be forced.