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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Silent Enemydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Ayane
    ASL Info:    17/F/IL
    Elite Ratio:    2.75 - 71/128/60
    Words: 356
    Class/Type: Poetry/Cutting or Mutilation
    Total Views: 660
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2281



    Description:
       In Memory of Eve

    For Kayla, Kara, Audio, Mara, and of course

    Me

    May we all find that same light someday.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSilent Enemydots
    -------------------------------------------


    I used to be happy, or so I thought

    Now looking back, I see that I was just too young to

    Understand



    It was my fault, It must have been

    Why would someone that loves me

    Hurt Me?



    I got older, and my eyes opened

    The world became more dark, more

    Terrifying



    Forbidden to cry, to scream, to anger

    I had to find a way out, to

    Let Go



    A silent painkiller, a welcoming release

    No one would have to know. Just me

    In My Room



    No guilt, no remorse. It was their fault

    Not mine. I was free of blame, Free of

    Blood



    Each stab and slice, taking edges off the nightmare

    My parents had driven me into. Red lines replacing

    Bruises



    I would look at other people carefully

    Do they hurt too? Can we relate? Are we the

    Same?



    Half disappointment, half relief. No marks

    They smile, I smile back and laugh. I've never felt more

    Alone



    Was this the master plan? This is my escape plan?

    When did I end up in the bathroom? On the floor

    Fading



    I wake up in cold liquid, everything foggy

    Clothes stained red, my face reflecting in passing death

    I'm Alive



    I tried to escape pain that was delivered to me

    By creating my own to cancel it out. To

    Equalize



    It's been two years, and I'm starting to breathe easier, smiling.

    Fading white lines are carried with me, The enemy that I

    Escaped



    I still survey people. But not for company.

    Simply for a chance, to take my hand. As I help them



    Into The Brightest Light They Could Ever Imagine





    Submitted on 2008-06-10 13:39:21     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I cut when I was in 8th grade and that was to deal with the the abuse that I was living with at home by my alcoholic parents. I dont' do it anymore and I wrote for my friends that still do so they would know what they're doing to themselves.
    I don't always write in this fashion. Read my others and you'd know that. Writing about something like this doesn't quite fit into a rhyming scheme, you know?
    Try opening your eyes to humanity more instead of bashing other peoples' work that you don't even read all of anyway.
    | Posted on 2008-06-13 00:00:00 | by Ayane | [ Reply to This ]
      If thats ur pic, you are a beautiful girl who needs not be covering her skin in scars

    BVG
    | Posted on 2008-06-12 00:00:00 | by b_v_grant | [ Reply to This ]
      I hope you are not listening to Paradox because this is not a site to discriminate nor to judge. Instead of pointing out the mistakes you made which to tell the truth i didn't read any he/she added insult to a lifetime of injury.Now for my comment: At first I thought it was just all over the place until I realised that the emotions behind ever line were actually felt, lived I started to read more keen. I hope whatever it is/was that you are/were facing, i hope you overcame it as you said at the end that ur actually smiling now cuz i think thats what you should do. Overall good write, it seems be a traumatic scenario which you survived. Just keep your head up and dont listen to any critic who thinks he/she knows what poetry means, as long as you can get it out thats good for you, just get it out....

    Between me and you, I've read Paradox stuff, it aint all that good either so i think he/she should critisize his/her self.

    Kuddos
    BVG
    | Posted on 2008-06-12 00:00:00 | by b_v_grant | [ Reply to This ]
      I'm sorry to say this but this is not poetry. It looks to me more like a journal entry of some sort. Just asking questions in a plain voice and telling what you are doing to yourself does not make a poem. Try reading more instead of cutting your arms and maybe you'll learn how to write a poem someday...
    | Posted on 2008-06-12 00:00:00 | by Paradox | [ Reply to This ]


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