my sweet cocaine by DontxSurrender

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Submission Name: my sweet cocaine dots

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Author:	DontxSurrender
ASL Info:	15/f/US
Elite Ratio:	3.53 - 30/48/25
Words:	163

Class/Type:	Lyrics/Passion
Total Views:	81
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	1112

Description:
i had no idea i actually wrote this..
crappy grammar too haha. oh wells

my sweet cocaine dots

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I breathe you in
you shoot through my veins
i love the way you feel
when you numb the pain

every single problem
that builds up in my brain
falls apart when you're with me
you, my sweet cocaine

im so fucking hooked on you,
there's nothing anyone can do

addiction, destruction,
im too damn high to function
im falling, withdrawing,
oh, i can hear you calling
without you i'd go insane
my sweet cocaine

you break me down
leave me lying on the floor
ive never felt like this
i need you more and more

what trouble could i have
when ive got you around?
i know this could hurt me bad
but you keep me safe and sound

im so fucking hooked on you,
there's nothing anyone can do

addiction, destruction,
im too damn high to function
im falling, withdrawing,
oh, i can hear you calling
without you i'd go insane
my sweet cocaine

Submitted on 2008-06-10 18:57:38 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
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||| Comments |||
  haha holy [censored]. when i read the title i was like 'whats this girl gotten herself into now' but now i see its just one of your cute little love songs. :]
but its a great metaphor, its smooth and makes you wanna keep reading.
(if i have the interpretation completely wrong, ignore me [:)
| Posted on 2008-06-12 00:00:00 | by xieno | [ Reply to This ]
  This is a fantastic write that describes the pain of addiction perfectly
The flow of this write is incredible in the fact it speeds up at times almost as if the reader is on this high with you and can feel the terrible depressive crash that withdrawal has
Again Fantastic Write
I hope and Pray this is not a true testomonial
If it is Please trust me on this there is Help out there
God Bless
Ron

Please if youn get a chance Please take a look at some of my writes and let me know what you think
Thank You
Ron
| Posted on 2008-06-11 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
  You could probably just say withdrawing, not withdrawaling...but besides that I really like it.

Sounds sort of like a song because of the structure and the way it flows. I don't know the tune it would be played to but it sounds like somehow it could work.

Really like the piece, a commonly portrayed theme, smooth read, great job.

~flora~
| Posted on 2008-06-11 00:00:00 | by blankscreen | [ Reply to This ]

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