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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: remember me.dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: save me
    ASL Info:    19/F
    Elite Ratio:    1.78 - 26/51/53
    Words: 59
    Class/Type: Misc/Longing
    Total Views: 678
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 367



    Description:
       i haven't really written anything recently, this is just an attempt.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsremember me.dots
    -------------------------------------------


    the darkness seeps beneath her skin.
    she feels the many gazes around her,
    her sunken eyes begin to glare.
    suddenly the air is filled with whispers.
    who will notice if she's gone?
    who will remember her?
    they say her name,
    all that comes to mind is bright hair,
    and the sad eyes, that once gazed upon them.




    Submitted on 2008-06-12 12:55:34     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This work is a little vague. And for that I find it hard to immediately relate to. It is definately original. I really like the last line it has a spark to it, but I'm just not sure how we got there. I personally would have elaborated a bit more. Keep up the work!
    | Posted on 2008-06-13 00:00:00 | by jayisademon | [ Reply to This ]


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