100% agreed with hybrid, the imagery could use some detail, not to say that simple imagery is bad, it just takes away from what youre trying to accomplish, sex love and pain
okay fine, but what about it?
spruce it up a bit, throw in some details it will sound good, good write.
Sorry, but wouldn't this be classified more as poetry instead of lyrics?
With that being said, it was decent. It brings up a thought of "cute obsession" but it really needs more development, and to get more in depth. It uses alot of erratic imagery that kind of makes me, the reader, lose focus from the point.