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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: I'm Tired.dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: dismal_s child
    ASL Info:    17/F/Florida
    Elite Ratio:    3.18 - 303/298/118
    Words: 118
    Class/Type: Rant/Venting
    Total Views: 56
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 829



    Description:
       Ick I'm on a rampage.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsI'm Tired.dots
    -------------------------------------------


    I'm tired of you keep putting me off.
    I'm tired of all those poems where everyone dies...or where good triumphs over all.
    I'm tired of being a servant
    I'm tired of not being able to cry
    I'm tired of courthouses.
    I'm tired of stupid rock songs the soundtrack of the young cut themselves.
    I'm tired of stupid rap songs about ass and gangs.
    I'm tired of music never capturing what I feel anymore
    I'm tired of school
    I'm tired of Cable TV
    I'm tired of myspace.
    Guitar Hero.
    Harry Fucking Potter.
    I'm tired of seeing myself in the mirror.
    I'm tired of waiting for someone to notice.
    Notice me.
    I'm tired of being broken.







    Submitted on 2008-06-29 22:03:55     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      i like this
    its kinda like your noticing everything but no one is noticing you
    and i think that if you really payed attention i think people do notice you and see you :]
    people love you weather they say it or not :]
    but i like how you strike [mostly] negitive things in your poem like the gangster music with theass and stuff, and the emo music and stuff. theres nothing that your negitive about that you should be happy for :]

    that makes me happy :]
    | Posted on 2008-07-01 00:00:00 | by Suicidalchild51 | [ Reply to This ]
      Hmm
    I love Harry Potter...That makes me want to be mean. But oh well. I'll be honest.

    Two obvious mistakes: The first line is phrased incorrectly. Line six has the same problem.

    Otherwise: The point is great and I like that you specified things because I hate most of the depressing poetry that is just vague and boring.
    | Posted on 2008-06-30 00:00:00 | by EEKS | [ Reply to This ]
      my perfect Angel...

    this one makes me wanna cry.

    i love you.

    -Mummie
    | Posted on 2008-06-30 00:00:00 | by ruejacobs | [ Reply to This ]


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    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



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