War by MinervaBlu

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dots

<< | >>

Submission Name: War dots

--------------------------------------------------------

Author:	MinervaBlu
ASL Info:	17 nowhere
Elite Ratio:	3.63 - 240/230/178
Words:	112

Class/Type:	Poetry/
Total Views:	54
Average Vote:	3.0000
Bytes:	689

Description:

War

-------------------------------------------

They wage war against eachother
Friends and family versuses nmy boyfriend
They do not see my heart holds them all
They will not bring this division to an end
It hurts me deeply to divide my time
To avoid one when I'm with the other
Together they are civil, but not at peace
With their hatred I am smothered

I love them all the same
Of my heart, they have an equal share
But each side fights for dominance
Wanting to control and it's not fair
They can slander with propaganda
But I side I will never choose
I and my heart stay neautral
Both sides of the war will lose

Submitted on 2008-07-05 15:35:38 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
I am old, but my memory remains very much intact. I was in this same place as a teen and thought myself wiser than those around me. In the end, he proved my parents had been right all along, but the aftermath left me looking over my shoulder for years. No, I'm not going to tell you what to do, but I will say you'll find the answer deep inside yourself. When you find that special someone, life falls in place rather than in disarray. Sharon
| Posted on 2008-07-09 00:00:00 | by Peggy Paris | [ Reply to This ]
You probably do not want to hear this, but oh well. I am not so old I don't remember how powerful teen age longing and "love" can be. But I am old enough to know that in the end "love" (especially young love) is just about excitement and infatuation. Once all the the novelty is gone, it almost always dies. Even fully grown supposed adults fall pray to the same problem. Why do you think over 50% of marriages don't work. Cause once the subtle nuances of the unknown are gone, all you are left with is a lot of work and compromise. Love is not a feeling, it is an verb that invokes actions and commitments.

In the end what I am trying to say is blood is blood. And until you find the man you are willing to break with blood over, you should always side and stick with family. Remember, real love is about action, compromise, and commitment. Which I would assume your family has already done and proven to you. Sorry I didn't review the actual work, but with all the spelling mistakes I can see you were pretty upset when you wrote this. I thought perhaps some outside objective advice would do you better than some half ass critiques. Hope some of my words sink in and they are of some help and comfort.
-Cody
| Posted on 2008-07-06 00:00:00 | by nicodemous | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece? 7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?

163362

Full Anime Episodes Streaming Free
5 million youtube videos all rated over 4.7 stars with 40+ ratings

[ Copy this | Start New | Full Size ]

Enter your search terms Submit search form

Web www.eliteskills.com

[ Chrispian ] [ Write Forum ]
[ Friends ] [ SNESroms ] .

[ Quick Signup ]
[ Lost Password ]

January 10 07
131,497 Poems
Posted

I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

[ Angst Poetry ]
[ Cutters ]
[ Famous Poetry ]
[ Poetry Scams ]

FontSize:
[ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]