Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: into our mirrored junglesdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: blackbird
    ASL Info:    31/male/reykjavik iceland
    Elite Ratio:    2.35 - 194/328/300
    Words: 164
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 752
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1159



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsinto our mirrored junglesdots
    -------------------------------------------


    & hope may brighten
    the shadowed heart.
    & you,
    busted the way that you are,
    mismanage all of your dreams
    in piles near the bed.

    i've seen you,
    running through your sleep
    with vivid, button eyes
    vibrating
    their twitch
    into your scene.

    my static hands
    could consume you,
    if only
    for a lifetime
    of wet pursuits
    into our mirrored jungles.

    my mouth
    is a spot
    to cataglott.

    under high superstitious ceilings,
    sleep is a frightful rock.
    a dungeon of paradise
    where i find my old self
    waiting for me.

    the head floats by the ankles.
    i feel the bare room
    trembling yellow in its labors.

    busted souls traveling
    through the world at this hour
    get recycled
    & a little less desperate.
    like the difference between god
    & bad information

    i wish everything slender of flower.
    i wish gray light turning green
    on dazzling snows...




    Submitted on 2008-07-07 22:14:17     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Ooo, this was great. I really like all your poems but this is my favourite. Only thing is I don't like how you started the whole thing with "and". I dunno, throws me off a little. But other then that fantastic!
    | Posted on 2008-08-03 00:00:00 | by kickit | [ Reply to This ]
      I really like everything about this except for the & symbols. I really hate symbols in poetry, but I'm sure that's just a personal preference. Other than that, I'm thoroughly enjoying your work! ^_^
    | Posted on 2008-07-14 00:00:00 | by Mandi Gayle | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    163434

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    untitled written by Outlaw
    The World written by jjd
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    Rooted in Nature written by Chelebel
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry