twenty six letters by joy7542

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Submission Name: twenty six letters dots

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Author:	joy7542
Elite Ratio:	5.03 - 1034/952/203
Words:	101

Class/Type:	Poetry/Misc
Total Views:	176
Average Vote:	3.5000
Bytes:	721

Description:

twenty six letters dots

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it's a shot in the dark,

not a star in the sky...

what chance do I have?

the wind blows the petals away
just as I being to bloom....I could land anywhere....

nowhere...

it's a blank page,
twenty six letters...
is anything really possible?
a thought my appear, a soul may seep through,
I may bloom between the lines...
or get lost along the way.

somewhere,

failure is shining its light
upon a future...what chance do we have?

none, some,

it's a shot in the dark....

so,

shine brighter.

Submitted on 2008-07-11 15:13:54 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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||| Comments |||
  nice work here! i like this a lot. really liked 'I may bloom between the lines'. only question is did you mean 'begin' in the line 'just as I being to bloom'?

excellent.
| Posted on 2009-02-06 00:00:00 | by joeyalphabet | [ Reply to This ]

I love poems that pull something out of thin air. That is the reason for imagination and maybe even the struggle we involve ourselves in to write in the first place.

And to find the right words from inspiration's strike to describe to the next soul who's listening? It is an art, and you've done a great job of finding the right words to say so.

I found one typo on my, it should be may,

"a thought may appear.." but other than that I wouldn't change
a word.

thanks for sharing

Nan
| Posted on 2008-07-15 00:00:00 | by nansofast | [ Reply to This ]
  This is something out of the ordinary.

"Faultier is shining its light on the future...what chance do we have?"

I like this line a lot; it is something of the mantra of my life. I read this and I am left wondering if this is to someone specific? Or are you talking form the perspective of humanity as a whole? It works well either way you look at it. There is hopelessness in your piece but not the loss of will.

Normally I like when a piece is vague and left open to interpretation, but I do believe this one may be more powerful and effective if you re-work it so that it takes us by the hand and leads us to where you where when you wrote it.

| Posted on 2008-07-11 00:00:00 | by nicodemous | [ Reply to This ]
  And if even the letters correspond to nothing in particular, learning to juggle them again will be its own reward.

it's a balancing act
really, this pirouette
on broken rope
with little to grasp
but a strand of air
and the best intentions

scraping rust from my eyes
scooping blood from the ground
and spinning the implement
like a sheet of sound

Good to see you back again.
bill
| Posted on 2008-07-11 00:00:00 | by rws | [ Reply to This ]

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