Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Fallingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Vampiric Death
    Elite Ratio:    2.27 - 133/159/91
    Words: 148
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Love
    Total Views: 752
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 1008



    Description:
       a song for my girlfriend.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFallingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I was standing tall and proud
    had no fear of falling down
    said I'd never love again
    back before my world came crashing in

    Now I'm falling down on my knees
    yes I'm falling begging please, baby please
    don't take your love from me

    I was a shadow, I walked alone
    I had nobody to call my own
    I was content to never love again
    with your smile the sun came shining in

    now I'm falling down on my knees
    yes I'm falling begging please, baby please
    don't take your love from me

    I'm so afraid, terrified
    still I'm here, trembling inside

    and I'm falling down on my knees
    yes I'm falling begging please, baby please
    don't take your love from me

    still I'm falling down on my knees
    yes I'm falling begging please, baby please
    don't take your love from me




    Submitted on 2008-07-19 08:51:55     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I see the pain in the write. I'm not sure how much this poem took out of you, however I do see that this poem is one that does follow your life story VERY closely.

    The imagery portrait is great. The style is unusual. The flow is well written.
    | Posted on 2008-09-15 00:00:00 | by augustcranes | [ Reply to This ]
      This was great! Your imagery describing first how you were content being alone, but now how love has taken over, and it's scary.

    Sometimes you don't realize what your missing, but when you fall in love, it's amazing and scary at the same time. This was portrayed very well.

    The flow worked very well!!
    | Posted on 2008-07-19 00:00:00 | by TheStillSilence | [ Reply to This ]
      you speaking for feelings that has taken away from you. the love for this person has left you for no reason. Good piece. check out my page
    | Posted on 2008-07-19 00:00:00 | by JoJoCrab | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    163821

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    This written by Chelebel
    I'm here written by BloodtornAngel
    ME written by jjd
    Tides of Man written by HisNameIsNoMore
    "other people don't get that" written by Daniel Barlow
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Skulls Beyond the Palisade written by HisNameIsNoMore
    On Top of a Water Wheel written by Wolfwatching
    Saying it to you with some gangsta shit written by Daniel Barlow
    A Fire! A Knife! A Black Crow Calls! written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Benediction written by Daniel Barlow
    Some of it written by Daniel Barlow
    Still written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Stretto written by saartha
    Bam written by Daniel Barlow
    Legends written by poetotoe
    Everyone written by poetotoe
    Chasing The Lie written by jackz
    One day older, One year wiser. written by Rhythmal
    Aftermath and Waltz written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Where is My Ghost written by ForgottenGraves
    The First Time written by Wolfwatching
    less is more written by Daniel Barlow
    Bam Bam / Bre-anna written by Daniel Barlow
    Watch them Die written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Dirge of Nostalgia written by HisNameIsNoMore

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry