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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Fallingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Vampiric Death
    Elite Ratio:    2.27 - 133/159/91
    Words: 148
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Love
    Total Views: 674
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 1008



    Description:
       a song for my girlfriend.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFallingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I was standing tall and proud
    had no fear of falling down
    said I'd never love again
    back before my world came crashing in

    Now I'm falling down on my knees
    yes I'm falling begging please, baby please
    don't take your love from me

    I was a shadow, I walked alone
    I had nobody to call my own
    I was content to never love again
    with your smile the sun came shining in

    now I'm falling down on my knees
    yes I'm falling begging please, baby please
    don't take your love from me

    I'm so afraid, terrified
    still I'm here, trembling inside

    and I'm falling down on my knees
    yes I'm falling begging please, baby please
    don't take your love from me

    still I'm falling down on my knees
    yes I'm falling begging please, baby please
    don't take your love from me




    Submitted on 2008-07-19 08:51:55     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I see the pain in the write. I'm not sure how much this poem took out of you, however I do see that this poem is one that does follow your life story VERY closely.

    The imagery portrait is great. The style is unusual. The flow is well written.
    | Posted on 2008-09-15 00:00:00 | by augustcranes | [ Reply to This ]
      This was great! Your imagery describing first how you were content being alone, but now how love has taken over, and it's scary.

    Sometimes you don't realize what your missing, but when you fall in love, it's amazing and scary at the same time. This was portrayed very well.

    The flow worked very well!!
    | Posted on 2008-07-19 00:00:00 | by TheStillSilence | [ Reply to This ]
      you speaking for feelings that has taken away from you. the love for this person has left you for no reason. Good piece. check out my page
    | Posted on 2008-07-19 00:00:00 | by JoJoCrab | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
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    12. Does it feel original?



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    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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