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hear me slowly


Author: discombobulated
ASL Info:    26/m/nz
Elite Ratio:    5.22 - 81 /63 /24
Words: 54
Class/Type: Random Thoughts /What is
Total Views: 1057
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 358



Description:


one of three i wrote last night while listening to the finalists at this poetry slam i attended. it was all very inspirational, it was.

read this slowly.
please.


hear me slowly





i might
argue this
inconsistency
mentioned about
girl guides and
boy scouts
searching
for reason
and rimbaud
perhaps neruda
singing sonnets
of despair
and sure ink
flowing
over moments
of me
and i
and ocean




Submitted on 2008-07-20 07:36:53     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  it was awkward's 'waiting' poem that sent me into neruda overdrive... funny how a line in one poem can have so much influence and direct you on a journey of deep discovery. and here you are
unearthing neruda for me again. along with
Arthur Rimbaud (now he has been pretty influential has he not) so i am in good company!
i must also confess to raising a huge smile at the incongruous mention of lord baden powell's lads in the same breath.

so .. this came to you as the poetry of the finalists washed over you. over you and i and ocean.
i wonder if they had any idea. (were you one of the judges?)

i did as i was told and read your words very slowly. my first impressions ..after the broad smile at finding girl guides rubbing shoulders with arthur and pablo.. i guessed you were not all that impressed with the offerings of the finalists....and might prefer to be under the ocean.



| Posted on 2008-08-12 00:00:00 | by Alter idem | [ Reply to This ]
  I don't think this plans to have meaning, just an essence. It's direct and bold and it demands(mostly I just get this from reading it slowly) that it is important for the simple reason of existence. I like the idea. It's sexy.
| Posted on 2008-08-10 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]
  Since the requested commentary is first impressions.

I like reading it though I can not find any meaning in it.
For just pure aesthetics, I'm all for it. For meaning, I'm lost.

I get a feeling of expansiveness when I read it. Maybe it's the ocean at the end. No idea.

I found the people searching for "reason/and rimbaud/perhaps neruda" interesting because, to me, those three are quite different from one another. I'm not sure. I don't know if that's what's inconsistent or if you intend the idea of scouts/guides searching for them inconsistent.

Maybe I'm taking this too literally, or not literally enough.

That's more of less what went through my mind on the first read.
| Posted on 2008-08-04 00:00:00 | by Sir Jimeth | [ Reply to This ]
  nice job here. i like the incongruity of scouts and neruda. a fave.
| Posted on 2008-07-26 00:00:00 | by joeyalphabet | [ Reply to This ]


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