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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Whispers In The Waterdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: AeThe Lost Poet
    ASL Info:    19/M/DE
    Elite Ratio:    3.6 - 147/184/122
    Words: 153
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 739
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 948



    Description:
       A redo of one of my older writes. ya'll know how it is when you look bakc and reflect...


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWhispers In The Waterdots
    -------------------------------------------


    humble me color.
    none other than blue
    fill my soul with thunder,
    wonder and hue

    few have heard the whispers in the water,
    like I taught her to do,
    So when I do, she hears me,
    And whispers in the water, too.
    So when it rains or snows,
    I send her “I thought of you's”
    like in chat, the fact is,
    “I'm just another part of you

    So this is what I do,
    When I miss you,
    When it rains or I cry,
    It's my tissue:

    I just listen for your voice,
    and the rain never fails,
    I just think of your face,
    and it lifts all the veils,
    I just think of your heart,
    so never will it falter,
    that I hear your voice,”
    The Whispers In The Water

    So when water falls
    I know that your safe
    I am prepared that day
    to accept my fate............




    Submitted on 2008-07-25 16:56:11     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This was written very well and very beautiful.
    I loved it. I wrote something like this, but with wind.
    It was touching and I'm very glad I read it.
    Keep up the great work, and I'll keep reading

    »Haely«
    | Posted on 2008-12-18 00:00:00 | by MinervaBlu | [ Reply to This ]
      sorry ya''ll, that was a typo. fixed
    | Posted on 2008-07-31 00:00:00 | by AeThe Lost Poet | [ Reply to This ]
      Man, atmospheric is the only word I can put on this, I hear rain fallin through this whole thing, and the rhythm just drives it through, doesnt let me stop like alot of thematic poems do. This one is deep.
    Josh
    | Posted on 2008-07-30 00:00:00 | by MC white | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh my god. I really really adore this. Its good on so many levels- flow, rhyme scheme, scenery, just the poem as a whole.

    Only thing if consider changing is-
    So this this is what I do
    maybe put
    So this- this is what I do,
    Or just take out the second 'this' because it breaks the flow a little.

    So what I imagined for this was either that they are lovers seperated with no way to communicate or she has died. Im leaning towards dead but it could be either in my oppinion.

    Fantastic job-
    Safire
    | Posted on 2008-07-30 00:00:00 | by girly101 | [ Reply to This ]


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