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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Your worlddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Lilyan
    ASL Info:    1 Elite Years
    Elite Ratio:    2.56 - 42/38/26
    Words: 142
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 142
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 981



    Description:
       Say what you think.. because this became in my life, this person..


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsYour worlddots
    -------------------------------------------


    Everyday you put those
    black sunglasses on,
    everyday you'r wearing
    your headphones.
    And so you don't see
    what's around you,
    and so you don't hear
    what we want to tell you.
    And so you are in your own world
    don't want to see,
    don't want to hear.
    You close yourself into
    your dreams and music
    like on purpose you
    cut your self away from the reality.
    There isn't nothing wrong
    with your life
    there isn't nothing
    bad about it for you.
    You just happened
    to get wrong friends
    You just happened
    to be in wrong place.
    And so you cut yourself
    away from this place
    and that way
    you hurt everybody around you
    Unfortunately
    you don't know that
    And unfortunately
    you don't see that,
    because you are in your own world.




    Submitted on 2008-08-03 17:07:41     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      is it outside looking in inside looking out?? i like the puzzle in it it can be interpeted differently i seen all your work and i this i how i see it i put many faces on this person thanks ray also thanks for the opinion on my work i appreciate it i have no structure ha im working on it but stay you you kick azz
    | Posted on 2008-11-18 00:00:00 | by zepposzag | [ Reply to This ]
      Hey, I liked this because it's kinda original and there's no rhyming pattern or familiar rhythmn to it.
    Furthermore, the topic you chose is quite common, but you chose to approach it from a different perspective which I liked =]

    Nibbs
    | Posted on 2008-08-03 00:00:00 | by Nibbs | [ Reply to This ]


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    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



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