Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: When...dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: broken heart
    ASL Info:    22/F/England
    Elite Ratio:    2.64 - 2/4/4
    Words: 92
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 712
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 652



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWhen...dots
    -------------------------------------------


    As I lay in the cool grass,
    Voices enter my consciesness.
    I pretend I am somewhere else,
    Somewhere different,
    Somewhere quiet.
    I dread the evening,
    When the vultures come and feed.
    I can see them all now,
    With their pale hairy skin,
    Coming to rip and tear at the rotting flesh.
    Their bellies bulge with vileness,
    Their mates all bloated with fear.
    They teach their offspring to copy,
    So they have shiney red villains.
    How beautifully the river sparkles,
    But is smirched by their disgustingness.
    When will they learn?
    Never, I expect.




    Submitted on 2008-08-05 19:25:56     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    164355

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry