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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Day by Daydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Jazzy
    ASL Info:    14/f/USA
    Elite Ratio:    4.78 - 84/139/145
    Words: 88
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 47
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 611



    Description:
       jaelatthedisco.synthasite.com


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDay by Daydots
    -------------------------------------------


    JAELATTHEDISCO.SYNTHASITE.COM
    CHECK IT.

    I see my past reflected in my
    Weary, swollen eyes. I live
    Every day in the shadow of
    Every mistake I've made.
    Each night I fall asleep, only
    To have my nightmares awaken.
    Sweet dreams are noiseless
    Victims of the past.

    Day by day I submiss myself
    To melding my two beings.
    I created this, somewhere
    Along the line. My past and my future
    Pull together into a movie scene
    Where everything goes wrong,
    And its somehow all
    My fault.




    Submitted on 2008-08-11 23:51:14     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||
      This poem is amazing. The structure totally works for what you're saying, and everything just fits together so perfectly. Honestly, it is so easy to relate to, and I think that it is something that a lot of people go through.

    This was defff my favorite part . . . . . . . . . . .

    Day by day I submiss myself
    To melding my two beings.
    I created this, somwhere
    Along the line. My past and my future
    Pull together into a movie scene

    Overall . . . . . . . . . . great job. . . . I really liked it.

    >>> >>> >>> >>> >>> >>> >>> >>> >>> >>> >>>

    S D 4 2
    | Posted on 2008-08-12 00:00:00 | by SilentDreams42 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



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    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
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