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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Blissful Torturedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: dreamer37517
    ASL Info:    20/F/Bama
    Elite Ratio:    3.84 - 155/142/45
    Words: 51
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 155
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 398



    Description:
       I know its real simple.
    Just bored one day


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBlissful Torturedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Sheets sweaty
    clothes scattered
    minute by minute
    nothing mattered

    face all flushed
    throat so sore
    voice half gone
    screaming for more

    A sensitive spot
    a burning touch
    it feels so good
    almost to much

    You feel the burn
    you feel the strain
    so much pleasure
    just enough pain




    Submitted on 2008-08-13 07:57:05     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Hi! kindly tell me what gave you the inspiration to write this poem?
    | Posted on 2008-10-24 00:00:00 | by Nightrider | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this one a lot. As you have said it yourself it is very simple yet very well written.
    I enjoyed reading it.

    With love

    Sanam
    | Posted on 2008-09-10 00:00:00 | by shabnam | [ Reply to This ]
      I think it has plenty of mental picture, poet09 just doesn't have any imagination. I think it's perfect. Small misspelling in the third stanza, (too) but other than that little nitpicking it's absolutly great. Definately fav worthy.

    The Bird
    | Posted on 2008-08-21 00:00:00 | by Swimming Bird | [ Reply to This ]
      So simple and staight to the point. I like the simplicity of this but i think that u could maybe have put a little more writing into this and give your readers more of a mental picture. Other than that good write
    | Posted on 2008-08-16 00:00:00 | by poet09 | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
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