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I sat on the rooftop as tears spilled onto your letter. it's been almost 3 months now and things aren't getting any better since we said our all goodbyes it's getting harder to play pretend and harder to have to lie but while the world just moves around me and my life just passes by I think of everything i should have let go but i just can't let you die and i just keep breathing. i can't imagine a sadder scene as i stand alone under these fireworks that light up the night sky above me it's getting colder and colder out here and i think it's not just the snow it's something about this winter night that chills me to the bone everything i do is reminding me of you this anniversary will never change my living room will never be the same. and it's killing me so good. but i keep breathing. i miss the late nights & driving me home listening to the songs only we would know the messing around and pillow fights the long talks that went into the night. the drinking that got us thinking of a future that held just us two but it's getting harder everyday to just keep breathing. but i just keep breathing. and i wish i wouldn't. |
I like the way this is written for the most part (aside from adding, or taking out a word here and there), and i like the imagery, and how it plays out a story. Kept my interest pretty well, but it seemed lacking of something extra (though i dont know what, sorry), for that little "extra spark" at times.| Posted on 2008-08-16 00:00:00 | by hybridsongwrite | [ Reply to This ] | Bittersweet memories of a lost love... you've captured the loneliness and despair very well with your choice of words and also the spacing between the stanzas. | I like the recurring reference to "I jest keep breathing"... there's no getting out of it is there? As long as you are alive you will breath and every breath will bring back the haunting memories... Very well written! | Posted on 2008-08-14 00:00:00 | by Beulah | [ Reply to This ] | |