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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: A nature poem whose structure is concurrent chaosdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Colten
    ASL Info:    19/Man?lol/U of I
    Elite Ratio:    3.05 - 62/99/43
    Words: 123
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 644
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 927



    Description:
       These are actually thoughts and questions while considering man's ever changing opinion on nature.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsA nature poem whose structure is concurrent chaosdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Oh, the hills, gorgeous and green
    The wheat and barley constantly seen
    To shimmer golden
    And nature exposed, so inviting

    This is pastoral

    Oh, the hills, shrivelled and shrinking
    The wheat and barley slowly sinking
    In earthen tones
    And nature exposed, not inviting

    What is pastoral

    These ideas of pastoral and savage death
    Are opposites co-existing
    For before this modern era man feared
    The forests, mother nature a cruel hag

    Now man hikes for exercise
    And enjoys it.

    Transcendentalism, hahahahahahahaha
    Yet, tree huggers have a point to make
    And truth it contains
    sometimes...depending on one's opinion

    To return to the forest man was never in
    In the beginning
    How absurd

    How primordial, indeed.




    Submitted on 2008-08-28 16:30:04     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
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    ||| Comments |||
      Well Nice one I picked up for reading

    1. You should really put in braces at the end of the poem what "Transcendentalism" means. I had to do a search which made me lose the flow of the poem.

    2. Nice change in poetic stances. That was quite interesting. But there was this one sentence that felt like a forced rhyme.
    " green
    The wheat and barley constantly seen"

    Other than that good writing.
    | Posted on 2008-08-31 00:00:00 | by keestu | [ Reply to This ]
      I love how your thoughts go full circle in this cleverly crafted poem! You taken a complex rhyming technique and fine tuned it so that it carries the reader effortlessly through the stanzas. I'm not really one for long poems or anything that rhymes but I enjoyed the way you've put this together.

    Very well written!
    | Posted on 2008-08-28 00:00:00 | by Beulah | [ Reply to This ]


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