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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: What you Diddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: grimmreaper
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 122/43/23
    Words: 445
    Class/Type: Random Thoughts/What you did
    Total Views: 944
    Average Vote:    4.5000
    Bytes: 2803



    Description:
       I am just pretty much Exercising my writing, I am not really trying to do anything. I know that its pretty lame and sucks, feel free to say so, I apreciate any form of feed back. Good Or bad. Just speak your mind


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWhat you Diddots
    -------------------------------------------


    You came to me in mid day.
    You asked me to do you a favor.
    You said that you wanted to try somthing.
    I asked you what it was.
    You said you wanted to kiss me.
    I said I didn't know,
    I had never tried it before.
    You told me that it was fun,
    That I would enjoy it.
    I said Okay
    that I would try it.

    You leaned down,
    You closed your eyes
    You touched your lips to mine
    I didn't close my eyes,
    I watched you.
    I saw you open your mouth,
    I felt your tounge inside my mouth.
    I didn't like it.
    I decided to stop
    it didn't feel right.

    I began to pull my body away from yours,
    .But you stopped me
    You Tightened your grip around me,
    You push your face tighter against mine.
    I Felt, Panic
    I sqirmed harder
    but you placed your arms around my head
    You made me stay
    You kept kissing me
    I cept feeling your tounge inside my mouth
    I hated it
    i wanted to scream.
    I wanted it to stop.

    You took one of your hands
    And
    You ran it up my shirt
    You undid my bra
    And you sqeezed my breats.
    I didn't like that either.
    But I still couldn't move.

    You force me down.
    I fought
    I tried to scream
    You covered my mouth
    You pushed me down
    You are stronger
    I coun't fight you off.

    I laid on the ground.
    YOu held down my arms
    You had covered my mouth,
    I am afriad.
    I don't know what to do.
    I can feel you
    Pulling at my pants
    Unzipping them
    you are getting inside of me
    it hurts
    There where tears
    streaming down my face
    You saw them
    but you didn't care
    You cept pushing on me
    faster and harder.
    Your breathing getting ruffer.

    I just closed my eyes,
    and prayed
    For it to pass.

    Now
    I am in my room
    Lying on my bed.
    I have my eyes closed
    i am trying to sleep
    But I can't
    All I can see
    Is your face
    Burned into the back of my mind.

    I try to dream
    But I only dream of you.
    You said you loved me.
    I said I hated you.
    You said you wanted me
    I said I wanted you to leave
    You said it was for both of us
    that is was good for us
    But I do not hear you
    I just think
    Of how you held me down
    and did as you pleased

    Now
    I cannot feel.
    I cannot think
    I cannot dream.
    I cannot even breath.




    Submitted on 2008-08-29 00:43:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      The piece is intense. At once, graphic and subtle. It really seemed that you draw the reader in, and it demanded full attention as one read further. Wow. There was a true strength to it. . . almost a desperation.
    | Posted on 2009-07-27 00:00:00 | by thepowerglider | [ Reply to This ]
      WOW... didn't expect that but i like that it was a surprise to me I like that you spoke words you've wanted to say for a long time I'm sure I'm glad you poured your heart out and said what truly needed to be said. this to me is AMAZING you are truly gifted

    Jackz
    | Posted on 2009-07-25 00:00:00 | by jackz | [ Reply to This ]
      This has brought up too much for me to leave a proper comment. I just wanted you know I was here and enjoyed it, in a manner of speaking. In reality I hated it, which is why I loved it.
    | Posted on 2008-09-11 00:00:00 | by nicodemous | [ Reply to This ]
      I thought I would offer a different comment in this post. Perhaps your typos are intended to show forth a nervousness in the telling but I had several stumbles in reading this. you have: "cept" for kept; "breats" for breasts; "afriad" for afraid; "ruffer" for rougher ;"tounge" for tongue and "breath" for breathe. I'm only mentioning these in case you haven't proof read the spelling.
    | Posted on 2008-09-10 00:00:00 | by realpoet | [ Reply to This ]
      A good description for rape. I hope this encourages others to not take the plunge into losing their innocence. A sad and more than horrible experience . Please pardon me, i laughed at the second stanza, simply because it tells of a first experience in "sucking -the-spit."
    | Posted on 2008-09-10 00:00:00 | by realpoet | [ Reply to This ]
      I read this...and almost cried. I can't imagine what that would be like...well i can but I don't want to. I find my self just wanting to wrap my arms around you and hold you and I don't even know you. And I don't know if this is something that happened to you or to someone you know but I feel such hurt. But you wrote beautifully about a horrible experience.

    --Oli
    | Posted on 2008-09-01 00:00:00 | by Oli | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh my God. Thats horrible. And sad. I almost don't even know what to say. But the poem was beautiful. I do not know whether you are writing from experience or not, but either way, the poem flows with such passion and hatred, that it seems real.

    I really like it. Great job!
    | Posted on 2008-08-30 00:00:00 | by dthforeverpain8 | [ Reply to This ]
      Reading this made me so mad, such a bad experience almost make me ashamed to be the sex I am. I wish I could say i know how you feel, or say something that would make you feel better, but I can't.

    If this is not a personal experience, ill say bravo!!
    if its not, its still well written. I could clearly see this was only written down once, straight from the heart, if you could revised it, use more descriptive words, maybe quote something he said to you, this would be quite special.

    Let me be the first to say welcome to ES

    :)
    | Posted on 2008-08-29 00:00:00 | by Polydectes | [ Reply to This ]


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