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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: White Rose Reddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: MinervaBlu
    ASL Info:    17 nowhere
    Elite Ratio:    3.63 - 240/230/178
    Words: 101
    Class/Type: Poetry/Me
    Total Views: 46
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 656



    Description:
       vol 4 age 14. Not nearly as good as what I'm now able to do, but it calls out to me.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWhite Rose Reddots
    -------------------------------------------


    You handed me a white rose
    I turned it red
    I'm glad I'm the one you chose
    But you see, this rose is dead

    Still full of beauty and grace
    But it has lost life's race
    Drooping petals, wilting flower
    To live, it has not the power

    I am this forgotten beauty
    The rose is just like me
    Loved by so many
    Yet, they don't see

    This white rose, red
    Wilting and dead
    Like my wrists in blood
    Once a beautiful growing bud
    Now crushed on the ground
    Laying in the middle of
    The secret path you found.....




    Submitted on 2008-09-04 22:45:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      People seem to only look at the outward appearance now a days. The thing is if they don't see you for who you really are then its their lost not yours. Never deny yourself of self-confiedence on the account of someone else. You are beautiful no matter what and you remember that.

    Josh
    | Posted on 2008-09-27 00:00:00 | by poet09 | [ Reply to This ]
      In hindsight it is indeed a good poem with alot of potential. I am really annoyed with myself for saying this but is there a way in which you could make your own feelings clearer or more obvious in this poem? I quite like it but the basis of your emotion is simply going over my head. Either way, good job.

    MSS.
    | Posted on 2008-09-05 00:00:00 | by MornSweetSong | [ Reply to This ]


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    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



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    January 10 07
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