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    dots Submission Name: Live a Lie dots

    Author: BusterLILblock
    ASL Info:    21/F
    Elite Ratio:    3.51 - 452/270/50
    Words: 338
    Class/Type: Poetry/Angry
    Total Views: 1371
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 960

       ummm... an unforgettable experience becomes only ink.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLive a Lie dots

    Live a lie if you will.
    Brace your tongue with steel.
    It seemed to rule the moment
    Were not all in perfection.
    But some reek of heedlessness.
    Gray see's through black and white.
    Seeping though imperfection.
    You can't hide anything.
    Because nothing can be hidden.

    Read my lips.
    If you can.
    As they flow,
    You wont catch them.
    The speed exceeds your comprehension.
    Intoxicating isn't it?
    Reeling you in,

    Consuming every hint of movement.
    Yet you can't seem to understand.

    Now can you recall,

    That moment seemed to fall.

    Submitted on 2008-09-10 21:26:48     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
    | Posted on 2009-06-02 00:00:00 | by gotsana | [ Reply to This ]
      The poem was great. I read the lines:

    "Read my lips.
    If you can.
    As they flow,
    You wont catch them.
    The speed exceeds you comprehension.
    Intoxicating isn't it?
    Reeling you in,"

    And I had to stop and just think it was really nicely written. It did seem to stumble a bit at first maybe you could do a quick one-over and see if you can improve it. But, only to improve the quality of this poem. If it didn't stumble you woulda got an "Add to Fave"!

    Good Job
    | Posted on 2008-09-24 00:00:00 | by dismal_s child | [ Reply to This ]
      wow...i agree wid geekysclacker...KAWABUNGA!!!...i was like stumblin' @ first then boom...it was like power zoomin' faster n fasta ....den wow...!!!...yeah dat's how speechless n wordless ur dear wordwiz friend is!!!...dude...i was so in2 it n i feel like i got kicked out of it or sumtin'!!!...
    | Posted on 2008-09-24 00:00:00 | by Jaiknob | [ Reply to This ]
      reading ur poem made me feel like i got hit in the head wid a steel bat. i think that means i identify wid what ur saying. dude that was brutal. i wrote a new one also.
    | Posted on 2008-09-20 00:00:00 | by geekyslacker | [ Reply to This ]
      the flow was good as was the entire poem just out of curiousity what is the poem concerning and to who?
    | Posted on 2008-09-18 00:00:00 | by darkonesgirl | [ Reply to This ]
      buster this poem is awesome. like wicked awesome. you are matauring in ur poetry. (=
    | Posted on 2008-09-13 00:00:00 | by DaGrimReaperess | [ Reply to This ]

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