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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: the redone version of life watchers dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: vencix
    ASL Info:    19/m/mi
    Elite Ratio:    1.61 - 19/88/66
    Words: 123
    Class/Type: Poetry/Venting
    Total Views: 719
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 557



    Description:
       i like the way my teacher made me use a program on Microsoft word that helped me make this better. also i made it look more like a poem then it did. heave fun reading it and i hope u like it


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dots the redone version of life watchers dots
    -------------------------------------------


    For days at a time it seems like they seem like forever that we wait and watch as life goes by us. Never stopping to enjoy the song birds tones or a flowers play. As we sit by and watch the sun go down and the moon rise. We sit like stone statues standing guard past a gate waiting to stop all that dare to trespass . As life passes by we dont do anything to stop it. But sit watch and wait for death to came and take us away. But before he comes a voice comes in to say start living life you want to because you never know you might die the next day




    Submitted on 2008-09-30 15:21:19     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I totally get what you're trying to say- the feeling of doing nothing and just going through the motions so by the end of the day, you really do feel like it was a waste. I particularly like the line "We sit like still statues standing guard."
    The only thing is I think it sounds a lot more like prose than poetry- maybe parts of it could be more subtle and it can be made to flow more.
    But really, I enjoyed reading it and I feel like I can relate. Thanks.
    | Posted on 2008-09-30 00:00:00 | by bananafish | [ Reply to This ]


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