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    dots Submission Name: Time for me to godots

    Author: grimmreaper
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 122/43/23
    Words: 256
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 769
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 1573

       it was a painful exsperince. i love my frind

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTime for me to godots

    I have decided
    that its time to move on
    and let go of you.

    I know that you may fall
    without me there
    holding you up
    with the strengh of my asteem,
    in the middle of this ocean
    but I must pull away
    before it is to late.

    Before I get to caught in
    and drown with you
    in this ocean
    of pain
    and misery

    I have held you up
    for as long as I was able
    using every bitter drag of strengh
    that I had inside of me.

    But its time for me to go.

    It was fun while it lasted,
    tiring and exsaughsting,
    excighting and thrilling
    and at the same time
    mentaly draining and confusing.

    But the party is over
    its time for me to part,
    and so,
    I take my hand
    and let you go.
    Swimming away back into the world,
    away from you.

    And as each stroke I take,
    leading me farther and farther
    away from you
    I hear your cries and screams
    for me to come back.

    And I wan't to.
    Because its not easy leaving some one
    that i love
    in a place
    only so that they can drown.

    But You got your self here,
    and I was only stuipid enough
    to let your drag me along with you,
    and now i see,
    what I have gotten into
    and so now,
    its time for me to leave
    and go back to my own life.

    without you.

    Submitted on 2008-09-30 22:02:53     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    ||| Comments |||

    I see why so many commented on this. I love how you used the ocean as a metaphor, how you decribed this person simply drowning if you did not stay but you have to go for you and you aren't trying to be bitter or selfish you are simply realizing now that wow this person is really dragging me down and although I love him/her I need to get my life back ... back where it belongs and needs to be.

    Dang this is amazing write!!! Not too long and not too short its just perfect!!!

    | Posted on 2009-07-25 00:00:00 | by jackz | [ Reply to This ]
      I feel this poem with great pain in my heart, because as i feel the words cutting me like a patient knife, slowly tempting every bit of self control i have, I realize that this time, I am not the one recieving the pain. I am not the one being used in the way this poem describes, i am the user. And knowing that hurts almost as bad or worse than being used.

    And as i ramble about my pain, i want you to know that it is a beautiful sad poem. I like the way you wrote it. :)
    | Posted on 2008-11-03 00:00:00 | by dthforeverpain8 | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow. I totally know how that feels. Very good write! My last relationship was like that, god, brings back horrible memories. I think you could have gone slightly deeper into the emotional aspect of it. But other than that it's great. I love how you ended it. "with out you" It's almost remorseful but still slightly angry.
    | Posted on 2008-10-11 00:00:00 | by amanda99737 | [ Reply to This ]
      i really like this a lot i've felt like that too. the poem draws me into it and i can see it happening in my head... keep writing

    p.s. thanks for the comments
    | Posted on 2008-10-11 00:00:00 | by StainedxBlades | [ Reply to This ]
      this was a heart breaking poem. its understandable that some times you need to let friends make thier own mistakes so they can learn from it and it achs to see them do it. Glad that you can do that, it's a hard decision to make.

    | Posted on 2008-10-01 00:00:00 | by faideddarkness | [ Reply to This ]
      You have to sort out the grammar and spelling,its all over the place,otherwise its not so bad,I cant say I loved it but i thought it was honest at the very least,

    some apects need to be expanded upon and some need to be much more subtle,if you fix it up a little this could be a decent poem

    good luck

    | Posted on 2008-09-30 00:00:00 | by Raphael | [ Reply to This ]

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