Description: Well... I haven't written in a long long time and it feels somewhat awkward, but at the same time it is a part of me I miss soooo dearly! Just getting some feelings out today!
Somehow I feel tainted
Like a scroll of touching words of love and wisdom
Coated with poison dust.
Somehow I feel tattered
Like my edges are no longer capable of sweetly slicing
Your thick, callused skin.
I feel airborne
Like an illness...
Airborne, but not soaring, not flying
The disease of failure spread by wind.
SomehowI am above it all
and beneath potential...
A silent, brooding storm
Collecting thunder in my hands
Until finally you will see me
Ok I think that this piece has great potential, but I also that that it needs some editing. The most obvious part is:
"SomehowI am above it all"
I think obviously this is supposed to go:
"Somehow I am above it all"
Beyond that, I think you should pay a little more attention to the way the piece flows. In the second line of the first stanza you repeat the word 'of' twice. For me when I was reading, the repitition of this word took away from what you were trying to say. I would try not using words for the sake of simply using them; rather make sure that each one has a known purpose. Any extra words you should get rid of, as it takes away from what you want to say.
I'm not ripping you apart, I think that this poem could fantastic, and you did many things very well. I hope you consider the changes, and good luck on your future writing endeavors.